love makes seman taste better
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
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