You made me cry and you don't even care
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
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