I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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