do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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