But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
