Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
