Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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