She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
