Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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