Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
