new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
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