She is in my trunk
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize
