tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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