I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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