You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
