3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
should my penis look like a turkey
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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