somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
The Olympian is in my bed
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
