a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send help, water and tortillas.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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