they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize