Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
