He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
