All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
