non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
pray to the hookup gods
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
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