You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Banned from zoo.
Again?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
