we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
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