also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i would punch a child for taco bell
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
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