can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
Randomize
