she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
