Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
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