Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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