If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize