THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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