It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
