and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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