I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Randomize
