real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize
