I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Randomize
