jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
