oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Randomize
