ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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