so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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