then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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