Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I'm both gender and math confused
My life is pants optional.
Randomize