Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
