So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
