ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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