well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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