I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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