She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize