Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
